“It must be cotton pony rodeo time,” and other incredibly brilliant insults that will totally make the ladies cry.
This one is also hilarious.
In the war of ideas, it is important to be well-armed. And that’s why one brave antifeminist warrior named Roy Scott Movrich has supplied his fellow warriors with some potent verbal ammunition, a full clip of misogynist insults designed to reduce all women in the immediate area to blubbering tears.
As Roy explains:
Feminists have gotten away with shaming language for too long. Far too long.
Its time we got our own back.
And since women in general have not stood up to defend men, it stands that all women are tarred with the same brush. Therefore ALL women are to be denigrated equally.
Fair’s fair.
Here are a choice sampling of insults to deride women with.
Try them and see. I did. And watch their ordure (translation: s**t) hit the roof!
A few of Roy’s insults are borrowed from literature (mostly from Shakespeare), but most of them are originals. In a manner of speaking.
He starts out with a puzzler:
Your’s is even smaller than mine.
Presumably he is suggesting that cis women/feminists have some sort of symbolic penis, and that this symbolic penis of theirs is smaller than his non-symbolic penis
He continues on with several other comments in this vein:
It’ll be way bigger than anything you’ll ever have.
The one you try to have is even smaller than mine.
And of course this classic:
Mine isn’t too small, your cooch is too wide/large/loose.
Then we get some vibrator-shaming:
Oooh! Bad mood! Did you run out of batteries?
And some wildly unoriginal negs:
You sound really old.
You don’t look your age. [Pause] You look [longer pause] old.
You look good enough to be my great-great grandmother.
This one might not be terribly successful with total strangers:
You were/are a lousy lover.
And then it’s back to the vagina:
You must be having constant periods.
It must be cotton pony rodeo time huh?
Note to self: Find out if anyone in the history of the world has ever referred to a woman’s period as “cotton pony rodeo time.”
Then on to cats, spinster-shaming, and general unpleasantness:
Did one of your cats just die?
You must not be married yet.
Can’t have kids huh?
There’s nothing a woman can do for me that my right hand can’t do better.
Even dung beetles are higher than women and feminists.
And back to the vagina again:
You obviously have one of those super large and deep ginas a man has to strap a plank to his back to prevent him falling into.
Note to self: Find out if there is anyone who refers to vaginas as “ginas” who is not a misogynist asscrack.
If you need more, Roy suggests that you can basically go with
[a]nything that implies her plumbing isn’t clean, has diseases or a foul smell.
After delivering this list (and some Shakespeare quotes), Roy somewhat confusingly concludes that insulting women is actually a waste of time:
[A]t the end of the day, given that women are devoid of logic and wit, using such choice insults is wanton waste.
Better to ignore them completely.
And since modern women, with their over-inflated sense of entitlement cannot abide being ignored, this is just as dramatic and effective as any insult.
In other words, the chance that Roy has ever used any of these insults in a conversation with a woman is roughly zero.
Like this:
Posted on March 14, 2012, in antifeminism, creepy, disgusting women, douchebaggery, evil women, girl germs, men who should not ever be with women ever, MGTOW, misogyny, MRA, shaming tactics, that's not funny!, vaginas. Bookmark the permalink. 165 Comments.
@LBT: I’m playing all these games on an Xbox.
I would generally endorse anything by BioWare for social justice. They are good people.
Dragon Age: Origins had the aforementioned non-heteronormative romance options. People whined about it on the Internet, claiming BioWare had neglected its “main demographic” because straight men play Dragon Age and Mass Effect and Knights of the Old Republic and everyone else plays The Sims.
This is what a BioWare representative had to say in response. It’s too long to quote in full and I can’t decide what to excerpt, so I’ll just paraphrase it quickly as “You exaggerate the importance of the Straight Male Gamer in our fan base, and we have the numbers to show that you’re not anywhere near as prevalent as you think you are. Our non-Straight White Male gamers deserve just as many game options as you do. We’re going to keep giving them those options and if you argue you’re just going to lower our opinion of you.”
So yeah, BioWare knows where it’s at.
It sounds like you don’t regret wanting to play these games, but I don’t know why you’ve taken a 10-year hiatus, so I just want to let you know I’m sorry if I’m causing you temptations you do not wish to have. The only expression I can think of right now for this sort of thing comes out of a certain strain of evangelical Christianity — I’m sorry if I’m a stumbling block for you*. I don’t think I am, and I think you’d say if I were, but I don’t want to blithely overlook some social pressure or something that’s making you not say so.
(Perhaps I overthink these social interactions.)
* And the implications and things packed up in that expression would take many thousands more words to discuss so I think I’ll stop now.
Oh, as far as Mass Effect goes, I understand there was an option in ME1 for gay romance in the development, but for some reason it got cut, leaving straight and lesbian options in.
So I’ve been talking BioWare up and now I feel like I have to walk it back some: They’ve gotten better. But they’ve gotten lots better very quickly. The first game was only released in November, 2007. Dragon Age was 2009.
So in general, and owning my privilege as a straight white male, I’m very happy with BioWare at the moment and I think there’s a new, diverse era dawning in vidja games.
RE: Falconer
Oh, nothing sinister about my gaming stoppage. It’s actually trivial and silly: the game genres I enjoyed most were platformers (on console) and adventure games (on comp), and one of those genres pretty much bit the dust a bit over a decade ago. Platformers are still around, but the PS2 (my then-new console) ones I tried turned me off, and then I just kinda fell out of it. I never want to hawk up the cash for a new console or new games, and I have no Internet at home, so I just kinda gradually phased out. (Still hoarding my copy of Grim Fandango to try out for a special occasion, though.)
Yeah, I read that BioWare article around when it first came out, and it made me damn happy. (I actually ended up using a fanboy catfight over Shale’s gender to spur a scene in a book I was writing at the time.) I really am getting seriously tempted, even though I don’t know I have the tech to support the game. (REALLY not interested in shelling out for a new comp at the moment, but I seem to recall my current one makes the specs, though barely.)
How is the game play for DAO? Does it reward exploring and thoroughness? Also, can I AVOID all romance options, if I want? How gory is the combat? (I got kids around who’re really sensitive to it.) How big a part does combat play?
LBT, I don’t know your specs, but unless you’ve got a high-end computer from 2005 I doubt you’ve got the wherewithal to play DA or Mass Effect. That’s a bummer.
I don’t know much about the romances in DA. I put the game down because when it comes to games I have the attention span of a golden retriever on spee — SQUIRREL!!
I hope one can avoid romances in DA, but I haven’t got that far.
I think both DA and ME reward exploration. There’s always extra bits to go poke. Mass Effect 1 has dozens of planets that Shepard can run around on in a little APC called the Mako. Sadly, they took it out of the vanilla game in ME2 and made its replacement, the Hammerhead, DLC. I have moral objections to DLC so I was stuck with scanning planets for resources from orbit. I don’t know what effect the Hammerhead has on the game, but even without it sometimes there’s something to explore on a planet’s surface.
As far as violence goes, unfortunately it’s a large part of both franchises. The violence in ME is pretty gore-free although people do react to being shot and sometimes they scream briefly. And then there’s somewhat silly things like freezing into an ice statue and shattering, or burning to ash in a few seconds. I would not recommend ME for a household with small children because everyone cusses a lot, except Shepard allows hirself a “damn” now and again.
On the other hand, Dragon Age is a bloodfest. After a fight your characters are covered in it. There are no internal organs, though, just lots and lots of blood spatter.
If I had to pick BioWare’s one flaw, it’s that they’ve only got one plot — invasion from beyond — and it’s a fightin’ plot. Their demographic is apparently a very diverse group of bloodthirsty savages
As one of those bloodthirsty savages, I’d say the one thing Bioware actually does suck at is morality. Their understanding of it is so comically inept as to be laughable. One of my friends playing The Old Republic mentioned a hilariously bad plotline that involved a hippy trying to prevent you from using a special microbe that’d clean up a ton of pollutiont hat was killing people. The hippy refuses to let you through. You can kill the hippy, save hundreds, possibly thousands of people by fixing the pollution… and get dark side points for it. You can leave her alive, and not dump the microbe, and doom thousands. For light side points. And that’s basically bioware morality in a nutshell
Whoop look what I just found on Tumblr.
It’s a chart summarizing the findings of a paper. The cite is White & Kowalsky (1994), Psychology of Women Quarterly.
It says that when a woman shoots her husband, the principal motive is most often self defense and she gets a 15-20 year prison sentence.
When a man shoots his wife, the principal motive is sexual jealousy and he gets a 2-6 year prison sentence.
Not to ruin anyone’s day or anything. As usual, these are the results of a study. Your Mileage May Vary.
RE: Falconer
Ach, bummer. I’ve been hemorraghing money the past couple months, and am in no way eager to get a computer that can handle a new game. :\ Also, the violence sounds like it’d make it a no-no. (The kid in question is actually a teenager, just… very, very sensitive to violence. I swear like a sailor though and that doesn’t bother zer at all.)
RE: Rutee
Yeeeeaaaah, that kind of morality makes me feel a bit. Er. Dubious.
RE: Falconer again
Wow, that means “Y: The Last Man” actually UNDERSTATED. When your post-apocalyptic comic book understates those stats, that’s impressive.
@Rutee: Oh, I’m one of those savages, too. When I’m doing tabletop RPGs I tend to like combat-heavy sessions better than combat-light ones. Although I do wish Mass Effect would have included more talk-’em-down options. When BioWare was trolling through the entirety of post-1960 sci-fi for Things To Do, why couldn’t it have paid more attention to the talkier episodes of TNG?
Is The Old Republic that new MMO? ‘Cause I’ve played KOTOR and I don’t remember the bit with the misguided hippy being in there. That “dilemma” does not sit well with me, either, but for crying out loud, is there no way to get past the hippy without employing lethal force? How hard would that have been to program?
@LBT: I haven’t gotten around to reading Y yet, but I take it you posted in response to the study I found. Oh boy.
How does one embed images ’round these parts? Do I use the img tags?
RE: Falconer
I started reading it after long dubiousness. I’ve read the first two trades, and thus far it’s pretty good… though the trans bullcrap in the first volume, I could’ve really done without. (Calling guys like me ‘her’ and ‘tranny’ and insisting we’re not real men? Not the kind of representation I’m psyched about, thanks.) I seriously think most of the trolls we get think all feminists are like the wingnuts “Daughters of the Amazon” cult in that comic, though.
Oh lord, I have no idea how the images work.
-Rogan
Oop. Caught in moderation. Lemme try that again…
RE: Falconer
I started reading Y after long dubiousness. I’ve read the first two trades, and thus far it’s pretty good… though the was trans people are treated in the first volume, I could’ve really done without. (Calling guys like me ‘her’ and insisting we’re not real men? Not the kind of representation I’m psyched about, thanks.) I seriously think most of the trolls we get think all feminists are like the “Daughters of the Amazon” cult in that comic, though.
Oh lord, I have no idea how the images work.
–Rogan
The funny thing about Dragon age is that if you don’t want gay romance or gay sex in your game, there is none. Because nobody in this world will flirt with you if you don’t flirt first! And several times, with increasing intensity. And since none of it is essential to the main plot, if you believe all sex is gross and kissing before marriage is immoral, you can just not kiss people, and they won’t kiss you in return.
Incidentally, if you want a male-only team, that’s also possible! So I don’t think straight men are so badly treated after all.
You can sum up the MRM in 8 words, really.
I know you are but what am I?
I know you are but what am I?
I KNOW YOU ARE
BUT WHAT AM I?
(and ur vagina smellz lolol)
RE: Kyrie
if you believe all sex is gross and kissing before marriage is immoral, you can just not kiss people, and they won’t kiss you in return.
I feel a little uncomfortable when I read this line. I just don’t think I’d want romance in my game where I’d essentially be playing a character as myself. That’s totally fine for other folks, just not my thing.
-Rogan
When I was 12 or so, I was a bit of a tomboy. I used to hang out at my schoolfriend’s house with him and his brother, and they used to think it was hilarious to try and inflict pain on each other’s genitals, being 12-year-old boys and all. One thing I remember in particular is that they’d use the word mangina to describe what you’d be left with if you had a nasty penis-related accident (e.g. if you jumped over a fence too low and whacked yourself in the crotch) and at the time we all thought this word was the funniest thing in the known universe.
So whenever a MRA uses that word, I have trouble picturing them as anything other than 12 years old.
In fairness, if I remember right, Zevran in DA:O will flirt mildly with your character, regardless of your chosen gender, if you are just reasonably sociable with him - but if you express disinterest he’ll stop, and that’s that. (And by “flirt mildly,” I mean I believe he says something implying that he thinks you’re good-looking. Oh noes.) I haven’t played DA2 yet, but given the way Bioware likes to recycle character personalities, I wouldn’t be surprised if one character is slightly flirty by default in it, too.
That said, if a player can’t deal with a fictional character on a computer screen saying something vaguely flirtatious to another fictional character, I think they have problems far too big for Bioware to solve for them. I mean, seriously, it’s bad enough to be worked up over the notion of “someone I’m not attracted to might be attracted to me” in real life, but freaking out over “a collection of pixels I’m not attracted to might be programmed to hit the dialogue option expressing attraction towards the fictional character I created” just takes it to a whole new level of pathetic.
@Rogan: I shouldn’t have expressed it like that. But the idea still stands: if you don’t want sex in your DA, there is none.
@Polliwog: I did not remember that, but I think you’re right.
I just think it’s funny that people are all up in arms about one or two games where you have the option to be gay, as opposed to the eighty bajillion games that force you to be a man in a romance with a woman.
I mean, Duke Nukem doesn’t have any option for “but I don’t identify as a douchebag.” It’s a much bigger issue.
RE: Kyrie
Yeah, I figured that’s how you meant it. And as for the flirty characters, that’s cool by me. People flirt with each other in real life.
RE: Holly
You made me sporfle with the Duke Nukem reference. Now I want, like, “non-douchebag” options in games!
Re: flirting
I do get weirded out by games where when you play as a female character, all the female NPCs flirt with you. (Saints’ Row 2 has this bad, Fallout 3 to a lesser extent.) It’s like a trip into Everyone-Is-A-Lesbian World because the script was written for a male player character and the female option was shoehorned in.
I don’t have a problem with NPCs with same-sex attraction, in fact I think it’s pretty cool, but having every woman in the game coming on to you all the time feels like an oogy little trip into Straight Male Fantasyland.
The sensible way to do it would be to have a gender preference (straight, gay, bi, a) and a set of turn ons/offs (e.g. black hair, mage, elf, blue eyes, blond hair, tall, warriot etc.). Then randomise these amongst the non-party characters. This is highly simplified, but it may be for characters who only get a few lines of dialogue.
Of course, then you’d have people complaining that all the XYZs were either ‘wrong’ gender preference or into [feature your PC doesn't have]. Just like real life!
Yeah, I hate it when it’s obvious that everything was written for a male PC; even some of the best games I know periodically have NPCs address my female character as “sir” or “boy” or “mister” because someone forgot to add another dialogue option, or have the Everyone-Is-A-Lesbian problem (or, even worse, the Everyone-Is-A-Lesbian-But-For-Some-Reason-I-Can’t-Flirt-With-Any-Of-The-Male-NPCs problem). It’s pretty pathetic in this day and age.
Not to treat this too lightly, but I get the impression that a lot of these guys in the “manosphere” are just frustrated little twerps that can’t connect with anyone and can’t do the introspection necessary to figure out what it might be about them that makes that the case. So, of course, they lash out at all women.
Oh god, I spoke too soon. Now BioWare has served up a sexy, sexy robot woman (ARE YOU LISTENING, ANTZ?). Perhaps I should say a woman-shaped robot. And by “woman” I mean Playmate of the Year.
Well hell. Guess I’ll just stop endorsing video games
(A golem! Who IDs as off the gender binary! GIVE IT TO ME JESUS.)
Shale’s a woman. It explicitly states as such when you either bring her to the Anvil of the Void or do her personal quest if you didn’t do that first thing.
I would generally endorse anything by BioWare for social justice. They are good people.
No, Bioware are apparently all idiots, since somehow they’ve fucked up three consecutive games now (DA2 is beyond help, but ME3 could probably be salvaged with a Broken Steel-style DLC).
@Petrygotus: DA2 was a solid 8/10 game. Not sure about ME3 since I haven`t played any game in the ME series, but the complaints I’ve seen seem petty (anybody still complaining about Day 1 DLC is unaware of the process by which games are made).